Ten reasons not to bother with Valentine’s Day

Fear of the reaper

1. It’s a made-up holiday

Modern trappings of February 14th have absolutely nothing to do with an actual St Valentine. 90 seconds of internet research, which included a brief skim of Wikipedia and is therefore completely incontestable, revealed that of the possible St Valentine’s the day might relate to none of these seem to have anything to do with romantic love. There were three possible St Valentines and two of them were beheaded so if the Day was meant to commemorate one of the possible saints then a more fitting tribute to/emulation of these potential saints would be for followers to decapitate themselves.

2. It’s a money-making scheme

Once you realise that St Valentine’s Day is only a mass commercialisation of a misinterpreted Saint then you might want to rethink buying into this and giving your money to Clinton Cards. The CEO probably isn’t going to use all their Valentine’s…

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