Wanted: Boyfriend (or cute, annoying guy willing to be fawned over)

Jennie wrote this really cute and funny Wanted: Boyfriend post from her blog. When she showed it to me a few weeks ago, I thought it was the funniest thing ever. I joked that I wanted to try writing one and she thought that was a great idea. She kept asking me when I will be writing one, but I was too busy (and lazy). Also, there’s the issue about my commitment-phobia. I’m quite sure I want to experience being in a relationship again, though I’m not quite sure I want one at the moment or if I’m ever going to be good in one. Taking that point into consideration, this post may not even make sense…like at all. It feels weird, even for me. In fact, I have to retype the title over and over thinking what’s the best way to approach it. Boyfriend just sounded sensible. Though, the commitment attached to it by most people probably won’t apply so much.

So, I guess I should probably explain the “job title” before heading off to the “job requirements”.

Okay, so what does “boyfriend” mean in this post? Well, a boyfriend here is definitely a male who is attracted to me as I am to him and who is also willing to play the generic boyfriend role most other boyfriends would play in a generic boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. The difference is, it’s understood by the “boyfriend” that we could probably not last very long together and that it isn’t about the length of time spent together, but rather about the moments spent together. Hmmm. I guess that sounds about right. Maybe I really am hoping to get into for a generic boyfriend type. Hah! And here I was thinking I was looking for something different haha

Anyway, on to the “job requirements”!

Qualifications:

Physical Qualifications: 

Allow me to fantasize and hope you could look like Theo James

Theo

but given the fact that he’s much better off in my fantasies anyway, I’m willing to compromise with just the following “requirements” (Hah!):

  • Works out and tries to keep a healthy lifestyle
  • Taller than me
  • Relatively good-looking
  • Gorgeous, deep, intense eyes

(Oh, wait, did I just describe Theo James again? How could you think that? That dude could be you. Have some confidence, man!)

Mental Qualifications:

This is VERY important. If you happen to be good-looking but your mind is empty or shallow, then I probably won’t extend my conversations with you. Though, I may still consider ogling you for not-so-nice-thoughts…or use you for your body (or face).

Anyway, back to the mental qualifications:

  • Reads books! You read books…not magazines. No, Playboy and FHM does not count. You could actually try to read real books. You know, those things with front and back covers and thick pages of paper. Yes, read the whole thing. I don’t care which genre. Just please read.
  • Has an opinion on politics, philosophy, environment, or any relevant topic. Be passionate about something you actually care about!
  • Is up for a debate or extended discussions on almost anything.
  • Has a creative side you regularly indulge in.

Personality Qualifications:

  • Confident (you may not be the best looking person, but if you got great confidence, you will definitely go a long way)
  • Has a zest for life. Indulge in your passions. Express yourself. Know what you want. Actually enjoy life.
  • Adventurous. It would be so much fun if we could go on so many adventures together.
  • Spontaneous and up for anything. I’m quite impulsive, sooo yeah.
  • Sweet.
  • Loves traveling (definite plus!)
  • Loves food (This should be at the top of the list…)
  • High tolerance for my random bouts of annoying-ness.
  • Low bullshit tolerance (because I’m not a fan of bullshit, either).

AND (Very important):

Sane, mature non-judgmental human being. Yes, that means you’re NOT:

  1. Homophobic, misogynistic, or an overall sexist
  2. Racist
  3. Bigoted
  4. Socially discriminating. You don’t care if a person is an atheist, feminist, a theist, rich, or poor, white or asian, etc. Humans are basically the same and you do not subscribe to social discrimination. Personally, I think social stratification and discrimination is another attempt at social slavery.. but that’s just my honest opinion.

I guess that’s about it. I’m quite flexible and adaptable to most personality types so if you’re essentially a sincere person with low tolerance for bullshit & asshole-ry, with a good head on your shoulders, then I guess we’re good. Good-looks and great body is definitely a plus. Oh, and awesome cooking skills. But…I can live with that.

And….

Reasons why you should apply:

Because I’m awesome?

Isn’t that enough?

Also, you did read  through this post to the very end…so, really, that’s up to you.

If interested, please line up along with my other suitors and admirers:

Let me remind you that it’s gonna get pretty crowded soon, so…I’m just saying.

Interested applicants may message me on this blog or directly reply to this blog post. Who knows? Maybe we could be friends on facebook (if you don’t turn out to be creepy stalkerish…or if I end up being creepy stalkerish).

You were warned.

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2 thoughts on “Wanted: Boyfriend (or cute, annoying guy willing to be fawned over)

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